AKA a run of the mill teen scream, annoying, (secretly) enjoyable and annoying – oh, I already said annoying? Exactly.
1.5/5 Screams
SPOILERS AHEAD!!
Hello strangers, first of all I have to say a very big, scary SORRY. I’ve been a terrible blogger lately and my only excuse for being MIA for the past few weeks is that I’ve been immersed in writing my novel which I have, finally, cracked. So It’s been all about the book and so blogging had to take a back seat. But, in between planning and plotting and scribbling, I did have time to watch three horrors. So, without further adieu, here’s the first.
Looking back at the notes I made on this 2018 horror is pretty amusing, I wrote ‘Oh, come on!’ and ‘What?’ multiple times. In CAPS LOCK, no less – so ya know I was really unimpressed.
I’d seen the trailer for this one several times as it was fairly intensely marketed as the new big one to see in the cinemas. The trailer had stuck it in my brain but without any lasting impression, apart from the plastic-lined, stretched out grins that reminded me of the masks in ‘The Purge’.
The beginning is intriguing, nothing remarkable nor terrifying, cliche jump scares and predictable violence. Basically, it starts like any run of the mill teen scream. One of the first things that struck me was the milking of the selfie culture in this film. It’s infuriating and, if anything, conveys the target audience as pretty young preteens. I suppose this film would be okay as a first watch, an initiation into the horror scene for thirteen year olds, but not for people who can identify any tropes or classic scenes that are common in horror. Not to mention the fact that these characters act like they’re fifteen or so, highschoolers at the most, rather than university students – not that i’m saying all university students are the epitome of maturity. Believe me when I tell you that that’s far from the truth. But the characters in this flick would definitely have suited a senior school setting more than university. Especially as the cheap jump scares really are just that, cheap and foreseeable.
Another note that, looking back makes me laugh as i’m so picky, is that some of the exposition and backstory are just lazily implanted into the film. For example, we find out that the protagonist’s best friend’s dad committed suicide through the line (from what I can remember) ‘since dad killed himself’ or something of the sort. This is just unrealistic dialogue, the characters know how he died; the only reason to be mentioning it in that way is to tell the audience. Lazy, lazy, lazy. It’s almost as bad as going: ‘Oh yeah, i’ve been feeling really terrible since dad died of complications from puerperal fever from the…….’. Ugh. Read your dialogue back people!!!
One thing I was curious about in this film is what its point is. Is this just a synthetic, cheap Halloween watch or is there a larger theme? I thought perhaps the whole thing could be an allegory for peer pressure but that may be my English student over-analysis!?!?
Another stand alone note that made me laugh in my notebook: ‘Neck break = Lol but good’. My bullet points are very eloquent, right? Who did the bloody dialogue again – ‘I looked like a Snapchat filter’. Seriously? Again, they’re talking like children. It’s infuriating and because they’re such bland characters you don’t actually care when any of them kick the bucket, thus rendering the entire film emotionally uninteresting and severing any connection with the audience that’s more powerful than ‘Oh, look – he snapped his neck on a pool table. Shame’. Another bone I have to pick with this film is less to do with this film in particular and more to do with the entire sub-genre of teen screams. Specifically, the gaslighting involved. The classic is the main character realises there’s some supernatural forces at work or a serial killer on the loose and everyone around her makes her/him feel like they’re going insane and it’s all in their head. And, quite honestly, this trope is neither effective nor appropriate anymore. It’s just dull and, not to get on my feminism high horse or anything, but this tends to happen to female MC’s more than male. Just my humble opinion.
My second high horse to clamber up onto is to do with the way Penelope’s character is explored, she’s referred to as ‘day-drinking Penelope’. STOP USING ADDICTION AND MENTAL HEALTH AS A LAUGHING POINT! Jeesh, this does my head in in these movies. It’s one thing to romanticise binge drinking and recreational drug abuse but to actively use it as a comedic character arc without exploring it any further than the surface is another. Please, directors and writers, just stop using these serious issues as comedy.
Moreover, the characterisation in general is just meh. None of them are likeable, interesting or more than just obvious cliches. Marki (also, who the hell is called Mar-k-i?) is selfish, Olivia is nothingy and bland etc. And realism is shoved aside with the dust and the lint, for example – nobody would be able to talk even somewhat rationally after over a litre of vodka downed like water. Her death is also infuriating. One plus, this film has a surprisingly okay sex scene – despite the fact that Lukas literally tells Olivia he doesn’t love her whilst he’s still inside, I mean…wow – for what is otherwise a seemingly PG13+ movie.
Final point: Sky Cinema rated this movie 1.5/5 stars and I can seriously see why. The ending was just like the rest of the movie, obvious, unintelligent, easy; leaving me exclaiming to my dog, ‘Oh for f’s sake, come on!’.
Don't Scream 